Life with a little less pressure
I heard the car coming around the corner at a leisurely pace.
Whew! Good. So many of my neighbors race to the end of the neighborhood as if this is a race track and they’re trying to beat their best time.
But this time, I was prepared. I’d be able to get out of the way without feeling like I was inches from getting run over. Or, so I thought.
Right as the car was rounding the curve, he turned around in the street and simply stared at the oncoming car. Refusing to move. It was like he’d become an immovable statue or had grown roots that held so firmly into the ground not even a hurricane would uproot him.
And the look. It conveyed a sense of stubbornness, “how dare you? I was doing something here. You move.” I began to panic. My heart started pounding, my breath…I think I’m holding it. In only seconds, which felt like minutes, I put my hands under his belly and pulled him to the side of the road.
He shifted his gaze to me, cocking his head, and then returned it to the oncoming car. Once again, he stared it down, maybe with a sense of defiance or maybe in an effort to see if he knew the driver.
Another seemingly close call. I swear I think I’m sweating. I put on a fake grin, raising my eyebrows at my neighbor while shrugging my shoulders. Finally, I take a breath. Doesn’t he know that dogs are supposed to have a calming effect on their household? THIS was not calming.
Unphased, Louie stares down the car until it passes. Then he goes back to sniffing the grass and pulls back toward the road.
Louie, my 14-year-old beagle mix, was having none of this, moving quickly out of the way business. It would be easy to blame this on his age. But he’s been pulling this same stunt for a super long time.
It’s made me a whole lot more hypervigilant about sounds. I need enough time to get us both out of the way without the flood of adrenaline and the hyped-up nervous system.
And even though Louie tests my anxious-leaning nervous system on the daily, I think he’s onto something.
So I started thinking, what if I could live a little more like Louie (sans eating cat poop). Better yet, what if we could all live a little more like Louie?
The main message I received was living without feeling pressured or rushed. I mean, really? Wouldn’t that feel great? And perhaps also a little strange and wonky.
Take a moment with me and imagine what it would look like to not feel rushed, pressured, or in a race against the clock. Now, go one step further. What does it feel like?
Here’s my example. I imagine moving from task to task with ease. Taking time in between chores and to-do lists to simply be. To feel the sun warming on my face, to feel my heart beating at its usual and customary rate, and to feel my breath…my whole breath breathe into my body. There’s no tension here, and my shoulders are in their rightful place, not kissing my earlobes. I feel more expansive, light, and free.
What does your version of living without feeling pressured or rushed look like?
Sheila Tucker is a licensed marriage and family therapist and owner of Heart Mind & Soul Counseling located in Hilton Head Island, South Carolina. She specializes in empowering clients who overthink, worry, and experience their fair share of anxiety to become more rooted in peace, ease, and confidence. While also helping clients become more curious, compassionate, and clear so they can communicate more effectively to create better relationships with themselves and others.
